When You Hit a Brick Wall

I was reminded of a Scripture after falling apart at my computer, crying and carrying on like a spoiled brat not getting her way. The words came to me like a whisper:

“If you falter in times of trouble, how small is your strength!” (Proverbs 24:10 NIV.)

Ouch.

Let me explain: I’ve been writing since I was a little girl. It’s tucked so tenderly within my heart, and I know God put it there. It’s something I believe He’s called me to do, so I will keep writing as He keeps leading.

And yet, He’s put other things in my heart that I don’t want to waste: I love talking (big shocker there for anyone who’s spent five minutes with me!) and encouraging others, and I love to create graphic art; taking photographs at the lake with my hubby and hurrying home to upload the pic so I can add under that bold sunset sinking into the water, “God is faithful.”

So when I prayed and felt led to do something with those photographs, got all my legal ducks in a row, and tried to flip the “Open for Business” sign on my little ecommerce shop, I was crushed when nothing came together. All that work and nothing to show for it.

Of course I did what any struggling entrepreneur might do when she hits a brick wall: I cleaned the house. Nothing helps to brush aside frustration and disappointment like a sparkling toilet.

But what I learned this morning while spending time with God was that when something gets too hard (trying to get this business up and running) or the wait is too long (also known as being a writer), I try to pass the time by either finding a shortcut or getting involved in something else. I like the feeling of accomplishment, looking back at the day and feeling like I did something. Yes. Even if it’s a dust bunny free living room that will be swarming with them in a few hours. (I wish they’d stop having parties at our house!)

Sometimes it’s as if I’m not even wandering in the wilderness, waiting to see God’s miraculous move in my life, but hitting that brick wall wherever I turn; I can’t even wander.

I finally realized when this happens, God is hemming me in, pulling me back, drawing me closer. Not to stop things from happening but to help me regain the right perspective, the right focus. To keep my spiritual eyes locked onto what’s really important:

Him.

You and I may feel at times that we’re walled-in, and no matter what we do we can’t move forward. But if we will just learn (please help us, Lord) to breathe, relax, and trust that His plan is going to happen and will be so much better than anything we can force to come together, then we will have all the strength we need to stand, to wait, and to move forward when He calls.

And we’ll also have the grateful, joyful heart we need to truly appreciate His miracle when it happens, when He opens the right door in that wall of ours.

“Don’t be dejected and sad, for the joy of the Lord is your strength!” (Nehemiah 8:10c NLT.)

 “The Lord is my strength and shield. I trust him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving.” (Psalm 28:7 NLT.)

(Photo from Pexels.)

Waiting

Just a little Spark.

“Wait for the Lord;

be strong and take heart

and wait for the Lord.”

-Psalm 27:14 NIV.

A New Adventure with God

I’d like to tell you I’m brave and adventurous. But I’m not.  I’m a big fat chicken.  I used to be more courageous, more willing to throw caution to the wind and drive off to unknown places and hop on a plane to unfamiliar territory.  Back when I was young (so many moons ago) I didn’t care about taking risks so much because I was the only one at risk. It reminds me of the time I drove to Nashville on this great adventure to become a songwriter; the risk of leaving my job and the life I’d always known was all on my shoulders.  If I loved it and it all worked out, great.  If I failed, no big deal.  I was only failing myself.  I could always head home with the thought of, “Well at least I tried.”

But I’m much older now and the risks don’t just involve me. I’m married.  My husband and I have a daughter.  And the very idea of spur-of-the-moment, life-altering decisions makes me sweat.  I don’t like it.  I like predictability now.  I enjoy the time of day when my husband comes home from work with a kiss and listening for our daughter’s school bus stopping at the bottom of our drive.  I count on these things.  I count on fixing dinner, washing the dishes, and folding laundry.

But sometimes God isn’t calling us to a predictable life. I mean, how would our faith grow if things never changed, if challenges never surfaced, if we stayed on the same gravel road?  Sometimes God wants us to follow Him into the weeds, into the forest where we can’t see much of anything; trusting only His hand in ours and His gentle whisper.

That’s what I’m about to do. By writing this post, I’m stepping out in faith and clutching onto His hand.  I’m still very much afraid, but I’m trusting God to hold me when I’m feeling weak in the knees, when I don’t know what I’m doing, when I can’t see my hand in front of my face.  I’m trusting His Word:  “When I’m weak, then I’m strong.”  And I know I need His strength to stand, to follow His lead on this new path.

Inside, I’m still the little girl with dirt caked under my nails from making mud pies, still the tomboy with tangled hair and scraped-up knees from climbing trees, and I’m still the girl who trembles at the thought of standing up in front of a crowd to speak. But God is calling me to do that very thing, to talk about Him. Gulp.

It’s a new adventure. A new adventure with God.  But this is certainly no drive to Nashville.  I’m not by myself on this one.  I have the support of my family and friends.  And really, I have my Heavenly Father showing me which way to go.  I don’t need to have all of the answers or all the directions mapped out in advance.  I just have to accept God’s invitation to take a deep breath, grab His hand, and step out the door.

The benefits of this risk? A deeper walk with God as my faith grows.  Snuggling up closer to Him in my most profound moments of weakness, clinging to His Word for my very breath, and embracing the opportunity to connect with you, His children, in ways I can’t even imagine right now.

And I am deeply humbled and honored that God would even consider leading an old tomboy like me with tangles and dishpan hands on such an adventure.

Thank you, Lord. Please help me to serve You well.

“But he [the Lord] said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:9-10 NIV.)

A Nudge from God

God nudged me this morning when I read this Scripture and even gave me a glimpse in my mind of the photograph He wanted me to use.  And He wanted me to share it that we may all remember:  God is always in control.  No matter who is in the White House, God Almighty is on His throne.

So let us all go to Him today and praise Him.  He is truly the One who rules the world.  And if we remember Him and seek His will, He can make us strong and bring us peace.

Unite us in your name, Lord.  Amen.