On the Verge of Discouragement

I think we’ve all been on the verge of tears before—that moment when you sense the tears are on their way, but they haven’t formed just yet.

But what about being on the verge of discouragement, when you sense that it’s close?

Let me explain what I’m learning:

I woke up feeling “off” today. My mind wandered to the things that upset me yesterday. And I started remembering the past and the times I’d been manipulated by others. Then some of the toxic relationships God has removed from my life came to mind. Throw in a lot of waiting, and BAM! I was on the verge of discouragement.

It’s like teetering. Which way will I go? Fall over into the muck of discouragement, or lean into God who is waiting to catch me?

The choice is mine. No one can make it for me.

I’ve fallen into discouragement before, and I can tell you it’s no fun. It can take days or even weeks to get “unstuck.” Thankfully, God picked me up and wiped the mud from my face every time.

But God doesn’t leave me (or you!) to deal with this teetering all on our own. His Holy Spirit nudges us to focus on Him. A friend may call to encourage us. We may “stumble” on a video about trusting God. We may even get a message from a co-worker about something good coming our way.

Here’s what I think: Satan roams through the earth, looking for someone to devour. One way he can devour is by filling our minds with consuming, discouraging thoughts, rendering us useless for God’s calling in our lives.

The enemy reminds us of our failures and past hurts, and he lies to us by telling us it’s going to happen again. So we build walls around our hearts to keep people out AND to stop ourselves from stepping out and making more mistakes.

These walls bring isolation. Now we’re dealing with discouragement and loneliness. It’s a double whammy.

Satan wants us to “roam” through our minds, SEARCHING for all the trash, so we’ll pick it up. When it’s right there in our hands, we’ll focus on it.

God, on the other hand, tells us in His Word to think about what’s lovely, pure, noble etc. (see Scripture below). He wants us to think about what’s praiseworthy. All of those things point to God! God wants our focus to be on Him and what He’s doing.

A cherished, intimate memory we have with God can keep us from falling into discouragement by keeping our minds fixed on Him.

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So when we’re on the verge of discouragement and our minds are swaying, we have a choice to make:

We can either focus on Satan’s trash, all the littering in our minds, and call it a day. Later, crying ourselves to sleep.

Or…

We can cry out to God and say, “Yes, Lord. Pull me in closer to You! Help me to focus on You and all the good You’re doing in my life.”

Which will you choose, my friend?

Me?

No more teetering in the middle of this teeter-totter with one foot down and one foot up. I’m getting off of this thing.

I’m leaning into God, grabbing onto His hand, and giggling with anticipation for whatever He has in store for this day.

And I’m expecting JOY. Lots and lots of joy in His presence.

“The Lord said to Satan, ‘Where have you come from?’ Satan answered the Lord, ‘From roaming through the earth and going back and forth in it.’”

Job 1:7 NIV.

“Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”

1 Peter 5:8 NIV.

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

Philippians 4:8 NIV.

“Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom.”

Psalm 145:3 NIV.

The Jar in the Suitcase

This is a continuation from my last post, Unlocking the Past. If you’re going through this too, please know I’m praying for you.

I pulled that heavy and musty suitcase (the one I was trying to bury that held all those things from my past) from the back of my spiritual closet and laid it on its side. I prayed to God, asking Him to unlock it for me, and begged Him to stay with me as I slumped on the floor.

The Holy Spirit strengthened me as we opened it together.

I braced myself, expecting to see a lot of painful things, ugly reminders of how I let so many people down.

But do you know what I saw?

A jar.

I sat there for a moment while the Holy Spirit reminded me:

Years ago, I’d gotten in over my head and God told me to step down from some things. But I WAITED to obey Him, not wanting to disappoint a number of people. I found myself crying out to Him so many times as I was lying in bed at night, just sobbing and trying not to wake my husband. I begged God to rescue me, knowing I was in serious trouble.

I knew I had disobeyed God, and it was crushing me. I’d never felt so overwhelmed, so defeated, and so alone in all my life.

And I failed. (Of course I did, I was disobeying God!) And yes, I failed a lot of people who were counting on me. But the worst part: I failed God.

But God didn’t help me to unlock my suitcase, so I could sit there on the floor and beat myself up again. I’d asked for forgiveness years ago, and I know God is faithful to forgive me when I ask. (If you’re still beating yourself up, this is for you too!)

So let’s go back to the jar I found in the suitcase…

The Holy Spirit reminded me of Elijah and the widow of Zarephath (1 Kings 17: 7-16). Her jar of flour was not used up during the drought. She didn’t die like she thought. She and her son survived.

God provided what she needed in that jar.

This glass jar I found in my suitcase, God’s provision for me, is FULL of His mercies and His never ending love; it never runs low or runs out. His mercy helped me to survive a terribly difficult time in my life, and His love rescued me.

And the jar is still full today, helping me to heal and move on.

My dear friend, if God has led you to pull out the suitcase from your past, and you’re opening it with Him, get a hold of that jar. (You’ve got one, too.)

God’s mercy and His love are for all of us. He will be with you right there on the floor, His Holy Spirit comforting you and speaking truth to you about your situation (leading you to ask for forgiveness if you haven’t already) and holding you close to remind you that YOU ARE FORGIVEN and YOU ARE LOVED.

Now, I don’t know about you, but I’m going to put my jar in a place where I can see it every day to remember my Heavenly Father’s love NEVER ends, and He is faithful beyond what I can even comprehend.

And I’m going to cry out to Him with songs of praise.

“God’s loyal love couldn’t have run out, his merciful love couldn’t have dried up. They’re created new every morning. How great your faithfulness!” (Lamentations 3:22-23 MSG.)

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9 NIV.)

 “Oh come, let us sing to the Lord; let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation! Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving; let us make a joyful noise to him with songs of praise!” (Psalms 95: 1-2 ESV.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Unlocking the Past

This isn’t the post I thought I was going to share today. But what can I say? God has been working on me. Maybe He’s working on you, too.

Dealing with the past can be hard. If you’re like me, you look back and blame yourself for…well…pretty much everything you can: the things you said and didn’t say, the timing of what you did and didn’t do. The list can go on and on.

But what if you and I stop looking back at the past as if it’s something dreadful to ponder, something painful that left us scarred and tattered, broken beyond repair and instead look to God? What if we hand over that old suitcase from our past, the one we’ve locked and buried in the back of our spiritual closet, and allow Him to unlock it?

It can be scary. I know. But what is even more frightening is living with the knowledge that the suitcase is still there, something we never dealt with, something we kept pushing to the back of the closet. It can hide in the shadows like some monster from our childhood, bringing nightmares and stealing our peace.

But what if, instead of being afraid or cringing with guilt when we see it, we realize that old piece of luggage can actually be a beautiful thing because of what it holds:

Experiences. Stories. Lessons.

They are the hidden gems tucked inside the suitcases of our past just waiting to be unpacked to help others.

Sure, the failures and disappointments are there – abandoned dreams still on hold, tear-stained journals, and faded, torn photographs. But those are the very things that make our stories believable, relatable.

We all have brokenness from our past.

But it’s up to us to decide what to do with it. We can either hand it all to God, surrendering its hold on us. Or we can let it control us from the shadows of our closet, leaving our spirits in a state of mustiness and stagnation, never learning, never growing; giving more weight to the past than the desire to move forward to the future God has for us.

(Deep breath here.) I officially surrendered my suitcase, my past, to God yesterday after years of ignoring it. And when I did, I realized it had quite a hold on me.

And today, well, today is a new day. And the lessons are pouring out as He holds me, steadying me…

I pray you feel Him steadying you, too.

“Don’t panic. I’m with you. There’s no need to fear for I’m your God. I’ll give you strength. I’ll help you. I’ll hold you steady, keep a firm grip on you.” (Isaiah 41:10 MSG.)

Focusing on God

Do you struggle with past failures? I do. And sometimes it can be really hard during quiet days because the enemy tries to sneak his lies into our thoughts:

You totally messed up.

You really hurt them.

You call yourself a Christian?

They never wanted you around anyway.

You don’t matter.

You’re replaceable.

They’re waiting for you to fail.

Suffocating? Good.

Feel that squeeze? Even better.

God is so disappointed in you.

Now wait just a minute. When you set your focus on following God instead of pleasing everyone else, God is NOT going to be disappointed in you.

So just relax. Whatever game the enemy is trying to play, put up your hand and say, “I’m out.” (Or you can whisper, “Jesus” or start singing and praising God and that old devil will flee!)

And you don’t have to follow the enemy when he tries to take you on his twisted ride down memory lane, searching for what you may or may not have done wrong.

Pray and ask God what you can do about it today. If He tells you, “Just keep your eyes on Me,” then you have your answer. If He tells you to make a call, pray, or forgive someone (that someone could be YOU!), then obey Him.

Always, in all things, obey God and trust that He has every right answer and every right step you will ever need to take. (Thank you, Lord!)

Just like a lovely blossom that grows from a cactus, there is beauty and surprising wonder in the battle for our souls when we focus on following God and pleasing Him and Him alone.

And there is always victory.

“You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord, is the Rock eternal.” (Isaiah 26:3-4 NIV.)