The Night I Almost Died

I was lying on a gurney in the ER, listening to the doctor explain how bad I was hemorrhaging. I’d had a C-section just six days earlier and wanted to be at home with our baby girl, not back in the hospital.

But I was admitted, had needles poked in both arms and hands, and remember the strange weight, the bags of blood lying by my leg as the nurse began the transfusion.

I was so thankful. I stared at those bags and thought, “Where would I be if those people hadn’t donated their own blood?” I knew the answer. I thanked the nurse as I leaned my head back on the pillow.

I fell asleep under a pile of heated blankets and when I woke up, I was in a different room with only a small light shining from behind me. There was an IV in my arm, and I was still lying in a hospital bed. The TV on the wall was quiet and there were no sounds coming from beyond my closed door.

Everything was still except the excruciating pain in my body. I’d been given a medication to induce labor; these were the same labor pains I’d had hours leading up to the emergency C-section six days earlier. Only now, I was alone with no cheering section and there would be no child to come from these pains, dulling my memory of the intense cramping.

I sobbed alone in the dark. I called the nurse and begged her to help me, to please give me something for the pain. It seemed I would have to wait.

As I remember that dimly lit room, it was there I needed God the most. I have no doubt that He was there, sitting in the shadowed corner, just waiting for me to call on Him.

But I didn’t call on Him. Why? Well, I’d been to church as a little girl, but I thought God was just this bigger-than-big Person who wanted nothing to do with me. Unless I messed up. Then I knew He’d show up on the scene to punish me with some ginormous lightning bolt.

Besides, I didn’t really need God. I was a good person and that was enough. I’d never intentionally hurt anyone or done some catastrophic wrong. So I thought I was good. If someone had asked me about heaven, I just assumed I’d end up there because I was, well, a good person. Oh, I’d found out about Jesus when I was little, even spent time with God in the woods behind our house (for that story, click here). But somewhere in my grownup mind, I moved away from Him. Maybe I thought He was going to ask me to give up everything fun, and I’d have no life whatsoever. (That, my friend, is what Satan wants us to believe, and it’s a big fat lie.)

But I can tell you how deathly alone I felt in that hospital room that night. The heaviness, the pain, the loneliness – it was unbearable. If only I would have known the truth about God, I would have called out to Him.

Perhaps He would have stepped from the shadows, His eyes so powerful and radiant and yet gentle as He smiled at me, bringing me comfort. Or maybe He would have remained unseen as He rested His hand on my head, singing over me, and bringing me such a peace I would have fallen asleep as the sound of His voice washed over me.

But we all have to face that “dimly lit room” where death is as real as the skin on our hand. Maybe you’ll survive like I did.

But what if you don’t?

Are you ready for that moment? Will you call out to a nurse, a family member, or will you call out to Jesus Christ Who is waiting; the One who has always been waiting for you to call on Him?

There is no detour around the only way to heaven. You can’t take a back road marked “Good Person Way” or “Church Goer Alley” or “Volunteers Enter Here.”

The only way to heaven is through Jesus Christ.

Just like the night I nearly bled to death but received a blood transfusion that saved my life, Jesus Christ gave all of His blood on the cross to save you and me.

That night I had to sign a paper agreeing to the blood transfusion. That was my part. The nurse did the rest.

Today you can agree, you can accept and claim Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior out loud, right now. You can claim His blood over you. That’s your part. Jesus has already done the rest.

The night I almost died, the doctor told me if I had waited until morning to go to the ER, I would not have survived. I’m so thankful I didn’t wait. Not only do I know Jesus as my Lord and Savior now, but I’ve had fourteen amazing years with my husband and our “baby” girl.

Please don’t wait to call on Jesus Christ:

“That if you confess with your mouth, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved.” (Romans 10:9-10 NIV.)

“Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” (John 14:6 NIV.)

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” (John 3:16-17 NIV.)

That Night: A Spiritual Battle

What would you do if you overheard a thief making plans and knew which house he was going to hit and when? You would probably tell the owner of the house or notify the police; not only because it is the right thing to do, but because you have knowledge that others may not have.  And along with that comes the responsibility to act.

I have a similar responsibility to you, my friends; one that I’ve been aware of for a long time, but I’ve never known when and how to approach it. You see, I’ve been afraid that the world would think I’m nuts.  But I’ve decided I’d rather the world think I’m nuts than to disappoint God in my responsibility.

What in the world am I talking about?

I have seen evil. I have seen a demon.  Literally.

No, I wasn’t hallucinating or under the influence of some sort of drug or alcoholic binge. I was lying in my own bed, my husband sound asleep beside me and facing away from me, when I felt this heaviness on top of me.  When I went to move, I realized my arms were pinned, my mouth and eyes shut tight.  I tried to talk but all that came out were mumbles.  Finally, I was “allowed” to open my eyes.

That’s when I saw it: This evil “thing” in between us.  I saw its twisted and distorted face.  I heard its sickening laugh when I couldn’t reach my husband or speak.

I wanted it to just be a dream, but I was wide awake. I remember screaming to God in my mind to help me, to save me.  I was terrified!  Finally this evil thing got off of me but it was still in the room.

I could finally move, finally speak, so I grabbed my husband and just bawled. I told him something awful just happened to me.  I begged him to hold me.  He did, but it didn’t help.  I could tell that evil thing was still in our bedroom.  It was close.

That’s when I remembered to plead the blood of Jesus Christ over us, my husband and daughter and myself, our house…everything.

The blood of Jesus Christ is what drove that evil from me.

It was gone.

I pulled myself together and ran to check on our little girl. She was asleep.  She was fine.

I climbed back into bed, shaking and still terrified. My husband tried to comfort me, telling me everything was going to be okay.  I asked God, no, I begged Him to show me something beautiful.  I knew there was no way I would ever be able to sleep again after seeing something so horrific if God didn’t help me.

So I closed my eyes. I started to see things that first appeared like stars.  It was like being in the night sky and watching stars get really bright and then dim.  Only after a few moments I realized, they weren’t stars:  They were swords colliding.  There was a battle taking place.   Only later did I realize that battle was over me.

This happened to me in January of 2011, but I can still remember the relief, the peace I felt when I saw those swords colliding. And when I knew God was there, really there with me in that moment, I asked Him why He left me earlier with that evil thing.  He answered clearly, “I never left you.  I’ve been here all along.  Where is your faith?”

That night changed me. Things got real serious.  All of a sudden God became very real to me.  He was no longer Someone I could live without or Someone I took lightly.  I had literally seen the opposite of God and wanted no part of it.  And I saw the battle, the awesome way God fought for me before my very eyes.

This is why I am the way I am today. I don’t talk about God all the time because I’m a “Bible thumper” or a religious freak or fanatic.  I do it because I love Him.  Jesus saved me from an eternity of evil by dying on the cross for me and my Father battled evil for me that night.

You see, it really is a battle between good and evil. And that’s why I pray for people who don’t believe in God because I have seen the alternative.  You either choose God or evil chooses you in the end.

And I pray for people who don’t believe in Jesus, who think His name is just a name Christians throw around to show their “holiness.” His blood is what saved me.  I know it.  I lived it.  And I still whisper the name, “Jesus” when the enemy tries to come at me (and he does try).

And I pray for people who toy around with evil, finding it funny in any way. It’s not.  Trust me.

Well, you don’t have to trust me.

But I do hope you trust God and His Word. Satan went after Jesus in the wilderness (and Satan lost).  Satan sifted Peter, but Peter turned back to God.  Satan attacked all of Job’s belongings, his children, and his body, but God blessed Job later.  In the end, God always wins against Satan.  Always.  In my life and in yours, God will defeat evil.  Trust Him.  And trust in the blood of Jesus Christ.

Heavenly Father, thank you for your faithfulness and your love. Thank you for rescuing us time and time again.  And Lord, I plead the precious and powerful blood of your Son Jesus Christ over all who read this, especially their minds.  Lord, I pray you give them eyes that see and ears that hear so they may know Your truth.  Be with them, each one, Lord, and draw them closer to you.  Thank you, Lord.  I love you.  It’s in the name of your Son Jesus Christ I pray these things.  Amen.

“The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”  (Exodus 14:14 NIV.)